In August 2002 I had just completed a project I have been working on with a corporate client for 2 years. Of which the previous 6 weeks I had been glued to my chair and the last two living in my office. As a result my cup was pretty empty.

It reminded me just how important self-care is, especially when you are self-employed and work at home. It can be very easy to slip into the office after hours and on weekends to get ahead or get caught up. There is a cost, however, are you willing to pay the price?

Yes there are things like bathing, brushing your teeth, combing your hair, shaving etc. However, the self-care we are talking about is more extreme than daily hygiene. Self-care is also about taking time to nurture yourself. Making and taking the time to do the things you enjoy, things that replenish and rejuvenate you. It will look different for everyone but what it does have in common is that it makes you feel good!

What are some things you can do? Read a book, go for a walk, paint your nails, go golfing, give yourself a facial, go fishing, get a massage, go skiing, meditate, go hiking, journal, go bike riding, sit in the sun, go horseback riding, dye your hair, go boating, work in your garden, go for a drive, walk the dog, go workout, have a nap, go swimming, paint a picture, go camping, pick some flowers, go snowmobiling, write a poem, go ski diving, bake some bread, go skating, do some knitting, go snowboarding, take a bath, go for a run etc. etc. etc. I'm sure you get the idea. You may feel physically tired after your self-care it is a good healthy tired not a stressed on the edge tired. Do whatever you need to fill your cup.

While it may depend on what you are doing and the time of year I recommend practicing self care a minimum of every two weeks and ideally to have it become part of your daily routine. Taking the time each day to do something you enjoy that will take you away from your work and the stresses of everyday life. You are worth it!

Self care is important especially to Virtual Assistants (VA's). The nature of the VA profession requires us to give a lot to our clients. We are there to support them in many different ways. Administratively, creatively, strategically, mentally, and sometimes emotionally. And this is in addition to the other roles you may play as mother, wife, sister, father, husband, brother or friend. When you keep giving of yourself without replenishing, your cup will be empty. When this happens things start to break down.

Some of the ways you may see this show up is in a lack of focus, communication breakdowns, reduced people skills, irritability, resentments towards clients and/or tasks, poor work quality, and generally not enjoying what you are doing or having fun. The cost is steep.

By nurturing yourself you then have something to nurture and support others with. You can't give what you don't have. You will be happier, more content, more relaxed, healthier, have more self-esteem, more energy, more vitality and have more fun. You will be able to stay focused and present for your clients. They are worth it too!!

"Learn how to turn frustration into fascination. You will learn more being fascinated by life than you will by being frustrated by it." -- Jim Rohn

If you are doing your job search for your work-from-home job you're probably realizing that finding a work-from-home job is a lot more difficult than finding a regular job. The reason finding a work-at-home job is usually more difficult is that there are a lot less of them available!

So, you may be feeling a little bit frustrated about your work-from-home job search. What it means when you're feeling frustrated is that you don't like the current situation you find yourself in and you want it to be different.

There's nothing wrong with that! In fact, sometimes it can move you to action. It's really HOW you respond to frustrating events that makes the difference.

Let's take a closer look at how we can all get frustrated with a job search and then a few more productive alternatives to being frustrated.

HOW YOU GET FRUSTRATED WITH YOUR WORK-FROM-HOME JOB SEARCH

You take it very personally when companies don't respond to your e-mails and your resumes. In fact you're convinced that it's all about you. What you really want is for things to happen right away.

You try to guess about the meaning of why a company hasn't returned your call or your e-mail. You start to create negative scenarios in your head.

You start to believe that you'll never get the work-from-home job that you want. You start to believe that there are no good jobs out there. So, you basically give up hope.

You get angry with yourself and everyone around you for your current situation. You live in a state of perpetual anger.

You do the same things over and over again with the same response as problems arise and you take the same actions to try to solve it. Usually with less than perfect results.

You start living in a constant state of stress. You can't relax, and you lose your patience very easily.

The stress that you're feeling starts coming out in your body in a physical way. You start getting headache and you feel agitated.

HOW TO GET FASCINATED WITH YOUR WORK-FROM-HOME JOB SEARCH

Take every single problem that you encounter and reframe it so it it becomes a new challenge for you to face. Something that you can learn from and something you can have fun with.

You start asking yourself a lot better questions. Instead of asking, "Why is this happening to me?" or, "Why is this happening now?". You start asking yourself, "How can I use this situation to grow?"

Another good response is, "Isn't this interesting? I wonder how I'm going to solve this problem?"

You start taking time to keep your eye on the prize. Meaning that you start visualizing the outcome you really want. You start picturing your ideal work-from-home job by getting into the moment. This allows you to focus on your goal rather than the problems in front of you.

You turn your job search into a game. You focus on the present moment and all the success you are having right now rather than focusing on what might be. Or what hasn't happened.

You don't take it personally. You have the belief that your job search is NOT personal. It's a matter of contacting the right people at the right time and you will get the work-from-home job.

In conclusion, you have a choice as far as how you see things. You can choose to be frustrated or fascinated. I know that you'll find fascination is a lot more productive in finding your work-from-home job.

When first starting out with a new client trust needs to be built and the relationship developed. One of the unique things about being a Virtual Assistant (VA) is the type of relationship we do develop with our clients and the virtual nature of them. This can create certain challenges and so let's explore some of the strategies and tools you can use to create close, lasting relationships with your clients.

One of the first things you should do to develop a client relationship is set up regular meetings with your client. Weekly, or biweekly at the most, is ideal. Use these sessions to get to know the client, their communication style, their energy level, their expectations, their standards etc. Ask questions to clarify anything you are not sure about and listen very carefully to what is, and is not being, said.

Be sure to establish any ground rules and boundaries you require of the client. Let them know what you expect from them. Remember you are a business owner and not an employee and you have the option about who you choose to work with and to support you in finding ideal clients.

Open and honest communication is critical right from the start. If your gut, instincts or intuition is telling you something is off, address it. If you have an idea or suggestion voice it.

Due to the wide variety of the nature of client's businesses we are presented with continuous learning opportunities. Your client may have some concerns about paying for you to learn. Reassure them that you will not charge for learning curves that will benefit you professionally. Take these opportunities to develop your skills and expand the knowledge base you are able to offer clients. Do not let the almighty dollar rule your client relationships.

Schedule regular debriefs with your clients. Debriefs are a useful tool to use with new clients that will allow you to discover what's working, what's not working and what opportunities are available to expand and develop your client relationship. Using this tool communicates to the client you value them and are focused on creating a successful partnership.

If your client is open to it, schedule strategic planning sessions with your client that can be separate or incorporated with the debrief. Find out what your client's current focus is in their business. What actions need to be taken to support reaching their goals? Map out monthly initiatives required to get there.

Keep track of these initiatives and review the results with the client. This will support both of you in identifying changes in directions required to reach goals. This will bring tremendous value to your client relationships.

One of the things I had to learn early on in my business was to be able to set up boundaries. I sometimes found this difficult and challenging as it went against my helping and supportive nature. What I learned was that in order to be able to effectively help my clients I had to have the space to do that. That meant setting boundaries for individuals who tended to drain my time and energy.

Boundaries are like imaginary lines we draw around ourselves to protect what’s important to us. They are about what we do not allow others to do to or around us. Everyone’s boundaries are unique to them and what is important to you may not be important to someone else. It is a very personal journey.

When you have healthy boundaries in place you will attract those people who have similar respect for themselves. They understand and respect other people's boundaries. You will have more room to learn and grow when you are not being drained by other people's energy. You will have more confidence as a result of setting boundaries as they will help define who you are as a business owner.

Boundaries are important to running a business for several reasons. When you are working from home family and friends may not take your work serious and feel it is okay to interrupt or make requests of you when you are working. Clients may feel they have access to you anytime they call you regardless of business hours or other commitments (be careful of too many last minute requests). They may not respect you as a peer treating you as less than. You will end up attracting needy and disrespectful clients into your practice and not your ideal clients. Boundaries will help you make the shift from employee to entrepreneur.

When setting boundaries you first need to decide what is and is not acceptable behaviour for you. Only you will know what this is. You will then want to set the boundary much larger than you need. For instance if the behaviour you are no longer willing to tolerate clients taking advantage of you then the boundary would be clients must appreciate what you do for them. And it is a must!

Only you can protect your boundaries however communication and education are the keys. Don't expect people to just understand what your boundaries are. Explain to them what the boundary is and what the acceptable behaviour is around that boundary. Be very gracious when doing this speaking with a neutral charge to your voice. Also learn how to say no!

Setting and protecting your boundaries is a learning process. At first it may be very awkward or you may extend your boundaries too far. With time, practice and fine-tuning your boundary work it will become a very natural experience for you and the rewards are tremendous!

When first starting out with a new client trust needs to be built and the relationship developed. One of the unique things about being a Virtual Assistant (VA) is the type of relationship we do develop with our clients and the virtual nature of them. This can create certain challenges and so let's explore some of the strategies and tools you can use to create close, lasting relationships with your clients.

One of the first things you should do to develop a client relationship is set up regular meetings with your client. Weekly, or biweekly at the most, is ideal. Use these sessions to get to know the client, their communication style, their energy level, their expectations, their standards etc. Ask questions to clarify anything you are not sure about and listen very carefully to what is, and is not being, said.

Be sure to establish any ground rules and boundaries you require of the client. Let them know what you expect from them. Remember you are a business owner and not an employee and you have the option about who you choose to work with and to support you in finding ideal clients.

Open and honest communication is critical right from the start. If your gut, instincts or intuition is telling you something is off, address it. If you have an idea or suggestion voice it.

Due to the wide variety of the nature of client's businesses we are presented with continuous learning opportunities. Your client may have some concerns about paying for you to learn. Reassure them that you will not charge for learning curves that will benefit you professionally. Take these opportunities to develop your skills and expand the knowledge base you are able to offer clients. Do not let the almighty dollar rule your client relationships.

Schedule regular debriefs with your clients. Debriefs are a useful tool to use with new clients that will allow you to discover what's working, what's not working and what opportunities are available to expand and develop your client relationship. Using this tool communicates to the client you value them and are focused on creating a successful partnership.

If your client is open to it, schedule strategic planning sessions with your client that can be separate or incorporated with the debrief. Find out what your client's current focus is in their business. What actions need to be taken to support reaching their goals? Map out monthly initiatives required to get there.

Keep track of these initiatives and review the results with the client. This will support both of you in identifying changes in directions required to reach goals. This will bring tremendous value to your client relationships.